Tuesday
Today I saw an advertisement at the train stop that said, "Now that we can do anything, what will we do?" It was for a new exhibit on technology at the Museum of Contemporary Art in Chicago.I saw this sign after sitting in on a conference in between the student leaders of 12 Chicago Public Schools (CPS) with the CEO of the CPS, Arne Duncan. These students were specifically selected from schools that were inundated this fall with students from failed schools that closed in the spring. I was one of the only white people in the room.
As soon as Arne walked into the room with the students, the tension level rose. The "dialogue" quickly escalated to preaching, yelling, and crying. The adults and student organizers walked around the room trying to make everyone listen to each other. Arne ended up not finishing any of his thoughts because the students continuously interrupted him. As has been my experience in meetings like this one, talk soon moved to the subject of racism and low achievement due to low expectations and negative press.
I am not discounting any of the things said at today's meeting. But I have heard them all before, at meetings, poetry slams, in books, in the newspaper. It feels like we're stuck, not being able to see beyond our past because we want more -I can't find the word- retribution? Although meeting with authorities is good, putting the weight on them of fixing all the problems you can see isn't realizing your responsibility to yourself and the people around you. You have a responsibility to change the way you live first.
Seeing something that said, "We can do anything" after experiencing frustration and anxiety for an hour and a half in this meeting made me laugh. First of all, I laughed because the people saying this have the immense privilege (or ignorance) to be able to think such a thing. They didn't go to an all black school on the South Side. They didn't have violence in their classroom, and walk to school in fear. All the students at this meeting do. I read in Barbara Ehrenreich's book Nickel and Dimed on the train, "In poverty, as in certain propositions in physics, starting conditions are everything." Because these students starting positions are so different than mine, or the makers of this sign, it feels to me like they're still at the starting line. They didn't even have the vocabulary in the meeting to fully express themselves. It was painful to me.
It was timely for me to see that sign to realize what the meeting made me feel. It made me feel hopeless for community with others, for reconciliation, for peace or understanding. It made me feel powerless to do anything. Like I've lost all my time.
I haven't though. We have time as long as we're willing to change. As my friend Patti says, "Everything is about relationship." I am more honest and true to myself when I bring my feelings and thoughts to another individual with whom I have a personal relationship. Together, we can begin to understand each other and change our actions accordingly. True relationships create accountability. There's no other way to make true change- I believe. True grass-roots, person by person, starting with myself. And that gives me hope. It almost makes me feel like we can do anything.
posted by Unknown @ 4:38 PM
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